Future over so many Presents.......

Why is it that we are never happy with what we have .... why is it that we strive for something bigger and better All the time...
Why is it that we never learn to say Enough...
Why is it we have soo many needs and wants.... Why are we never satiated.... When will we reach the saturation point?


Are these questions only in my MIND.... does anyone else get bothered by such things... Maybe Yes!... Maybe others have other better things rather than sit and ponder over such issues!


Its a boring Tuesday afternoon... I am siitng alone in my small little messy hostel room... listening to music and thinking... Why?
Why am I doing this... Maybe I just have too much free time in my hand... Not that I don't have anything else better to do... Infact I do... I just don't feel up to it.
See what am I doing here.... I am not valuing TIME.


In future when I will maybe have things to do as in... earn a living, meet targets, stick to a routine, meet commitments, etc etc... Maybe then I will wish that I had more time in my hands and maybe I will look back to these days when I didnt value what I had.
Yes the realisation will come but a bit too late dont you think...


I just mentioned time as one of the major examples... but yes this holds true for plenty of other things in life...


Value time, money, people, places, era, food, trends, success, everything while it lasts...!


When at home we tend to take certain things for granted... for example parents.... I dont mean to sound preachy or anything but Seriously when I got the chance to stay away from them I was happy... didnt realise that was going to be temporary.... small things from getting Hot and Fresh food ready for you to the fresh and crisp laundry to the clean surrounding which I littered carelessly ...now I look around and I think that I should have appreciated...
Some old friends that I have now lost touch with... and I sit back and reminisce the old memoirs and also the fact that how self absorbed I have become that I didnt really stay in touch coz I thought I had better and bigger things to do!


Rather than enjoying the moment that we live in... we are caught up in anticipating what the next big thing might me... No one sits back, takes a deep breath and enjoy ... Reason... its a fast moving highly competitive world and if you take a break.... you are soo out of the league...!


Shouldnt this Change? 

{[(Trapped)]}

I made this sketch during one of my low moments........ Why?.... to maybe believe that this reality was basically just a bad dream ....


Maybe the reflection on the mirror is a better place to stay in rather than what I get to see now.
The concept behind this is that the female protagonist is in a very dark phase of her life...... to signify this the room is lit only by a single candle casting its shadows on most of the area....giving the place a gloomy feel. The sole candle also signifies loneliness....its not to be confused as a ray of hope.


The girl feels trapped and she wants the mirror to lie to her....  show her a made up version of reality. Show her false projections of something happy and joyous and help her take her mind off the unpleasant things in life.!


Life has become a roller coaster ride.... actually NO,roller coaster ride is still fun... you have your frightening moments and moments with so much adrenaline rush that by end of it you are either shocked or just so happy that you made it. In short you enjoy it..... But this doesnt hold true now-a-days.... I mean theres so much hypocrisy, bureaucracy, double standards, cheating, fraud, rape, extortion, suicides, massacres, wars, murders, kidnapping, typhoons, cyclones, earthquakes, etc etc....


There is just too many of these instances..... I know this may not be directly affecting me at the moment, but at this moment, as you read this, someone maybe taking their last breath, people die every second. But does that even bother anyone. No, I guess not, as far as I know that I am not dying or the people around me are not I guess I am invincible till then.
Doesnt that make you wonder that how Heartless one has become.... I know some might think that well Arent we supposed to like Live our Life while it lasts.... but still, it doesnt mean that we are going to turn a blind eye towards it.


So yes that is what has become life for this lady in the picture and she wants to believe that she is just trapped in a piece of glass and that Yes one day she might break through it to see the optimistic and happy version on the other side If at all that exists.........

Expectations....

We all know what expectation is.... as in its something which we continually apply in our day to day being....
I mean from the smallest of things such as expecting from a person to do something for you by paying them to the unsaid expectations for the bigger and emotional things.


Now paid one is obviously the one where in you are paying someone for doing some kind of chore like a laundry guy to wash clothes and you expect him to do it properly.
The problem basically lies in the unsaid expectation, usually triggered by emotional relationships. Why is it that people expect so much from others?

Why do they become dependent on someone else?
Can they not be totally care free and not really put their hopes on someone else?
Are they not scared of being let down?.... I guess they are but each and every person is an emotional fool. The degree of being emotional may differ but still.... in the end they do expect.


The variants of expectations from people would be like...
Mom: you should respect your elders.... you should keep your stuff neat and clean ... you must eat healthy.... why do you stay up late?.... why dont you help me out in the kitchen sometime?....bla bla bla


Dad: you know you should keep an account of things you spend on..... you are supposed to run random errands... you should be more serious about your life and career....you think money grows on trees.... bla bla bla


Siblings: you know you should like give me gifts and stuff.... that chocolate was not just for you.... if I am lying for you that will cost..... uh huh...sharing is caring isn't it?..... bla bla bla


Bf/Gf: do you love me?.... you are supposed to call me and talk to me every waking second.... hello...I need some air..... bla bla bla


Friends: lets hang out...... uh i dont like that person so u are not supposed to talk to them.... pinky swear... bla bla bla


So these are just like a sample of expectations...which can drive anyone crazy.....
so is it good to have expectations? I dunno... maybe it is... it gives u a feel good factor that if ppl do live up to your expectations.... but what if they don't....
....
Food for Thought!

There's always a first time....

Who am I?
Why am I doing this?
Where do I come from?
There are going to be a lot of  whos n wheres n whys and hows..... I will have definite answers to some which will relate to the factual data but some..... I might not know!
so who am I.... a 22yr 11month and 6days old female.
where do I come from..... basically from the Indian subcontinent....eastern coastal belt from the state of Temples but brought up in the capital city!
why am I doing this..... ummm it was just something that was there in my imaginary to-do list and I recently thought that I needed to vent out the inner feelings in a much more detailed manner rather than just sticking to the limited space on fb or something.....
Ok so whoever might accidently read this might think "yeah, hello its like such an old thing and ppl have been doing this for like ages now".... but ya forgive this lil soul.... There's always a first time to things....
So here I am writing my very first blog! :)